♪♪♪♪ ♪♪♪♪ -We love the classroom
instruments segment where pop stars do their hits
on the classroom instruments, and we thought we wanted to do
magic on classroom instruments, and this is our magic kit, and one of the things we put
in the magic kit was we put this trick we both
had when we were children. It’s called
the ball and vase trick. Everybody who had
a magic kit as a child had one of these. You probably all know how
the trick is done. So here are Penn & Teller,
8 years old, doing their version
of the ball and vase trick. [ Inhales sharply ] Once in Transylvania,
there was a blue stone coffin! And in it was
the Prince of Darkness, Vlad the Impaler… Dracula! And every night, at dusk, when the wolves and the bats
come out, Dracula would leave his coffin,
fly around the village, being scary, scary, scary,
scary, scary, scary, and then at dawn, he’d appear
back in his blue stone coffin. Every single night at dusk,
he would leave the blue stone coffin,
fly around the village, being scary, scary, scary,
scary, scary, and then at dawn, he’d appear
back in his blue stone coffin. Now the villagers hated this,
but they weren’t mean people. They didn’t wanna beat up
Dracula. They just wanted to stop him
from flying around their village and being scary. So they waited until a time
that was very…inhospitable to Draculas — high noon,
and they dug up the coffin from the undead Earth,
and they put the lid on, but instead of just snapping it,
they put paste and tape and spackle and cement,
but still at dawn, he got out! How’d he do that? So now they did beat him up,
and they put him over in the Land of Dead Draculas, which is over here
in this corner. And then they checked the coffin
again, and oh, no, even worse. Cloned Dracula!
It’s a cloned Dracula. And they beat him up, too,
and they put him in the Land of Dead Draculas, and they checked the coffin
again, and, oh, no,
another Cloned Dracula. When is this gonna stop? They beat all through him.
They said, “Wait a minute.” Where are these Cloned Draculas
coming from?” And they said maybe they’re
coming from the bite of Dracula. They checked Dracula’s mouth,
and sure enough, that’s where they
were coming from. They beat him up, too,
but they checked again, and another Cloned Dracula,
so they beat him up, and they checked again,
and another Cloned Dracula. It was Cloned Dracula,
Cloned Dracula, Cloned Dracula, Cloned Dracula, Cloned Dracula. So they said,
we gotta stop this. So they went — they went to
the Transylvania Public Library and they looked up
“Killing Draculas.” And it said you could kill them with holy water
or a silver bullet. Well — silver bullet — that —
that’s werewolf. Or with garlic. So they made a paste of that, and they got
a clean popsicle stick, and they smeared it
all over the Cloned Draculas. When they checked the coffin
again, it was empty, and they felt really safe. And they felt
really good about — Aah! Then across town,
another Cloned Dracula. So now they got a bazooka.
Kill the brain, kill the ghoul. And they shot ’em in the head.
[ Imitates gunshots ] And they killed them all.
They checked the coffin again, And even worse, Zombie Dracula!
-[ Mouths words ] -And then Zombie Dracula.
And they beat him up — Why you’d beat up a zombie —
it’s already dead. That’s just stupid talk.
That’s crazy. But they checked the coffin
again, and even worse, Cloned Zombie Dracula!
-[ Mouths words ] -Cloned Zombie Dracula,
and they beat him up, too. When they checked again,
well, still, it’s a zombie. They checked again.
Another cloned zombie. You have three, four, five, six,
seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12,
googolplex, infinity. Aah! King Dracula!
-[ Mouths words ] -They took King Dracula.
Oh, by the way, this is a solid ball.
This isn’t a sponge ball. This is solid.
This is hard magic. We worked on this
for a long time. And they said, “We gotta
figure out how to kill all these Draculas.” So then one
of the village people got the… [ Laughs ] It was —
was one of the Village People. [ Laughs ] Yeah,
one of the villagers… But… [ Laughs ] It was the Indian
of the Village People. Well, he’s the smart one.
He said that — okay. What kills — what kills —
what kills Dracula is the sun, and the power of the sun is also
the power of the hydrogen bomb. It’s nuclear fusion.
So they took a hydrogen bomb, and they filled it
with holy water and with garlic
and with real magic, and they set it off.
[ Imitates explosion ] Mushroom cloud, and it turned the whole Land of Dead Draculas
into glass and they checked
the coffin again, and it was empty,
and the villagers were safe. The end. Or is it?!