Bowser Jr.: Oh man guys! I can’t believe Chef Pee Pee got us Happy Meals! Joseph: I know, right dude? I love Happy Meals! I know, right dude! I love Happy Meals! Bowser Jr.: Me too! Me too! Cody: Yeah, I can’t wait to get heart disease by the time I’m 50! Cody: Yeah, I can’t wait to get heart disease by the time I’m fifty! Joseph and Bowser Jr.: Yeah! Joseph and Junior: YEAH!!! Joseph: Obesity! Joseph: Obesity! Bowser Jr.: YEAH!!! Bowser Jr.: All right guys, before we eat our Happy Meals, let’s turn on some TV! * presses on remote* Eh! Alright guys, before we eat our Happy Meals, lets turn on some TV. Angelica: *grunts* Gimme that! Tommy: Angelica, please don’t take my Reptar! Tommy: Angelica! Please don’t take my Reptar!! Angelicah: Hah, and what are you gonna do about it? You’re nothing but stupid babies! (evil laughter) Tommy: Chuckie, do something! Tommy: Chucky, do something! Chuckie: Okay, Tommy… Okay Tommy… Angelica: What are you gonna do about it, Finster? (Chuckie wails) AHHHHHHHHHHHH *FALCON PUNCH!* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~BONK~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (Family friendly attack noise) (Angelica screams) *Crunch* *Thump bump bang* *CRACK* [Music happily sings as Angelica lies on the floor dead]
(Chuckie wins! FATALITY!)
(She’s dead, folks.) i think shes dead* [Tommy and Chuckie happily watch Angelica die] Cody: She deserved it. Cody: She deserved it. Bowser Jr.: Right? Angelica definitely deserved that! Because she’s mean! And she also always carry around that stupid doll! And she also always carry around that stupid doll! Joseph: Yeah, just like Cody! (roasted) Joseph: Yeah, just like Cody! (roasted) Bowser Jr.: OOH! BURNED! Junior: OOH! BURNED! Joseph: Savage! Bowser Jr.: Buh-Buh-Buh-Buh-BURNED! Junior: B-B-B Bowser Jr.: Uh, today’s word, kids, is “Burned”. Spell it with me! Uh, todays work kids, is “Burned”. Bowser Jr.: B-U-R-N-D, BURND! B-U-R-N-D Joseph: WOO! Cody: Junior, that’s not how you spell “Burned”. Cody: Junior, that’s not how you spell “Burned”. Junior: Uh… Ye-yeah it is! Junior: Uhh, yeah it is! Cody: No, it’s spelled: “B, U, R, N, E, D”. Cody: No it’s spelt: Wha- B, U, R, N, E, D? Cody, that’s not burned, that’s bur-ned! Bowser Jr.: Wha- B, U, R, N, E, D? Cody, that’s not burnd, thats burned. Joseph: Yeah, Cody! That doesn’t sound right… Joseph: Yeah, that doesn’t sound right… Bowser Jr.: Yeah, thats BUR-NED, Cody. Junior: Yeah that’s burnED Cody Cody: No, that’s not how- (Bowser Jr. stuttering) Cody: *stuttering* Bowser Jr.: Hey Joseph, Does this make sense? “Uh, hey hey Joseph, my house BUR-NED to the ground!” Joseph: *GASP!* Oh no, Junior, not your house BUR-NED to the ground?! Junior: It buRnEd tO tHe gROunD!11 Junior: It buRnEd tO tHe gROunD Cody: Guys, you’re gonna make me cuss and we can’t do that! (Whoa watch your language, kids! Nice joke, Logan.) Cody: Look guys, you’re gonna make me cuss and we can’t do that! (Nice joke logan) Bowser Jr.: Oh-oh-oh, Okay Cody, yeah, lets just forget about it. We don’t want you doing that. Junior: Alright I’ll just leave it at that, uhh we don’t want you doing that… Bowser Jr.: All right, so let’s just calm down and eat our Happy Meals. All right, let’s open them. Alright guys, lets just calm down and eat our Happy Meals. (all agreeing) Bowser Jr.: (grunts) Oh man! I got some “Nugs”! I love me some Nugs! Oh, man! I got some “Nugs.” I love me some Nugs. Cody: Check it out, Junior. I got a Go-Gurt. Check it out, Junior. I got a Go-Gurt. Bowser Jr.: W-w- You got a ‘Gurt? I want one of those! Junior: W-w- YOU GOT A GURT?? I want one of those… Cody: Oh, I got a ‘Gurt. Bowser Jr.: Wha- Hold on. I don’t have one of those! 🙁 Cody: Well, of course not, Junior. Only cool kids get Go-Gurt. Only cool kids get Go-Gurt. Cody We don’t have time to just sit around and eat normal Yogurt with a spoon. We’ve got places to go. Cody: So we grab our ‘Gurt. Bowser Jr.: Oh, man. I wish I was that cool. Cody: Sucks to be a square, Junior. Joseph: OH DUDE! LOOK AT MY TOY! Bowser Jr.: WHOA! W-What kind of toy is that? Joseph: I dunno. It kinda looks like a basketball hoop… Bowser Jr.: W-wha… Cody, what type of toy did you get? Cody: I dunno, lemme take a look… Cody: Oh, Junior, I got My Little Pony! (He got Rainbow Dash) Bowser Jr.: Well, that’s dumb. Cody: Junior, that’s not dumb. That’s Rainbow Dash. Don’t you be talkin’ sniz about my Dashie! Ya hashie. Joseph: Hey, dude. What did you get, Junior? Bowser Jr.: Uh, lemme see which one I got. It’d better be cool. A TV Remote? (Cody and Joseph laughing) Joseph: Dude, what?! Cody: Junior, why did they give you a TV remote, where’s your toy? Bowser Jr.: Yeah, where *is* my toy?! Why did they give me a stupid TV remote? I already have one! Cody: Junior, I think they ran out of toys, so they just gave you the closest thing they could find. Joseph: Yeah dude, no basketball hoop for you! Cody: So lame! Joseph: Right, dude?! (continues laughing…) Bowser Jr.: This is stupid, I don’t want a TV remote! I want a cool toy like you guys! Cody: Well Junior, at least see if it works with your TV. I mean, that way if you lose this remote, you still have another one. Bowser Jr.: Yeah, I mean I guess if this remote works, at least I’ll have 2 remotes. Bowser Jr.: All right, I’ll try to pause the TV. Okay. *Pause* Bowser Jr.: It works, see? Look, it paused the TV show. Bowser Jr.: You see that, guys? (Junior, they didn’t listen…) Bowser Jr.: Guys did you see that it paused the TV? Bowser Jr.: Oh, I get it. You guys gonna ignore me now because I didn’t get a toy with my Happy Meal! Bowser Jr.: Oh, that’s why you think I’m not cool enough? Bowser Jr.: I’m not cool enough for you guys to talk to me, is that it? Bowser Jr.: Is that it, Joseph? Bowser Jr.: We’ve been friends for years, but you guys gonna ignore me because I didn’t get a toy with my Happy Meal? Huh?! Bowser Jr.: Cody? Bowser Jr.: Cody? Bowser Jr.: Joseph? Bowser Jr.: All right guys, you wanna ignore me? Then fine, leave! Get outta my house! Bowser Jr.: I don’t wanna be friends anymore! Leave! Bowser Jr.: WHY AREN’T Y’ALL LISTENING TO ME?! LEAVE! Bowser Jr.: I’m gonna tell Chef Pee Pee that y’all wont leave, y’all ignoring me! Bowser Jr.: Ahh, Chef Pee Pee! My friends are ignoring me and they’re being mean, and I want you to tell them to go home! Bowser Jr.: Chef Pee Pee? Bowser Jr.: Chef Pee Pee! Bowser Jr.: Don’t ignore me, too! Bowser Jr.: WHY IS EVERYBODY IGNORING ME?! CHEF PEE PEE! (Frustrated wail) Bowser Jr.: (groans) Chef Pee Pee’s ignoring me, my stupid friends are ignoring me! You guys can leave! We’re not friends anymore! Leave! Why are y’all ignoring me?! You know what? I’m just gonna watch TV! *Unpause* Oh, I guess it didn’t work Junior. Dude the batteries must be low! Oh now you guys want to talk to me? Now that I unpause the TV you guys want to be best friends. Well I’m not having! Leave! What are you talking about Junior? Yeah dude! When I pause the TV, you guys stop talking to me. You start ignoring me. No, when you paused the TV nothing happened. You don’t remember? No no no, when I hit that pause button, you guys started ignoring me and so was Chef Pee Pee. No one was moving. What? What are you talking about? Well try it out, Cody, hit the pause button and see for yourself. OK. *Pause* Junior I don’t understand… J-J-Junior? Joseph? Guys? (slowly) OHHHHH YEAAHHHHH. (laughs) (slowly) OHHHHHHHH YEAHHHHHHHH 5 years later… (What is this, 2022?!) (panting) OK… I think I’m ready… Here we go… *Unpause* Both: (groaning) Oh god… Oh, what happened? Oh dude, m-my butt hurts! Mine does too! Oh, yeah… that’s cause’ you guys were sitting on the couch for so long… that’s… that’s what that is… I’m winking behind my glasses. Oh, Oh, Cody did you see what I was talking about? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I definitely saw what you’re talking about Junior. This remote controls time. It controls time? Yeah. When you hit the pause button, it stops time. Really? Yeah. Well long did you keep it pause for? Oh oh God like, like 5 years. FIVE YEARS?! WHAT DID YOU DO FOR 5 YEARS?! Oh what didn’t I do? I I mean I I did everything I mean you name it I did it everything I could think of. Oh well, so you’re telling me that with that remote I can pause time and do stuff to people? Yeah, yeah. And they won’t know? Nope. So I could pause time and go punch Chef Pee Pee in the face and he won’t do anything? Yep. I’ma try that! (grunts) (growling) I can’t believe you knocked those cookies out of my hand, you stupid mutt! Hey Chef Pee Pee! Junior, get your mutt out of the kitchen! He’s making a mess! No! WHAT?! *Pause* OK Chef Pee Pee, i’ma punch you in the face! (Punching) Unpause it. *Unpause* (groaning and gibberish) (laughs) This is so cool! Oh my god, what happened? What happened to your face, Chef Pee Pee? I don’t know. I’m trying to figure out! It must have been to that stupid mutt! I KNOW IT IS. I KNOW IT IS. (laughs) Guys, guys, guys! I paused time and I punched Chef Pee Pee in the face over and over and over and he didn’t know it was me! Wow that’s messed up dude! Yeah Junior I don’t think you should be using your remote to do bad things. Well, you paused the world for 5 years! Yeah but I didn’t do anything bad.
You know… Well I want to keep pausing time! There’s still stuff I want to do! No, Junior! This remote has too much power we need to get rid of it! Get rid of it? It came in my Happy Meal! It’s my Happy Meal toy! But Junior, that was a mistake! You’re not supposed to have this! OK you’re just really jealous because you got a stupid Rainbow Dash toy! Junior I am NOT mad about my
Dashie! Now you need to get rid of this remote you’re gonna do something stupid and mess something up! You know what, Cody? I-I don’t like your your language you’re speaking you know what? I’m gonna change your language to Spanish! (Speaking Spanish) (laughs) What’s he saying, Joseph?! I don’t know dude! Your not making sense Cody! What are you saying? (Speaking Spanish continues) You sound like a robot talking about spaghetti or something! (laughing) (sighs) You know what? I’ll change you back buddy. Junior do not ever do that again. Fine but I’m gonna keep playing on my remote. What do you think this fast-forward
button does? Junior it probably fast forwards time. OK, OK. So you guys are mad that I hurt Chef Pee Pee. So how about I make it up. See? There’s a mess downstairs that my dog made. So how about I fast forward him cleaning up the mess? Huh? It’ll help him out! I guess. Yeah, dude. That’ll help! OK, i’ll do it. (grunts) (sighs) I can’t believe Junior’s dog made this mess! Chef Pee Pee, what are you doing? Junior get out of the kitchen. I’m trying to clean up the mess that your dog made. OK. *Fast Forward* (YAY) Chef Pee Pee, your all done! Wh-Wow. That was really fast! Yeah, your welcome Chef Pee Pee. Huh? OK guys. I made it up to Chef Pee Pee. I fast forward him cleaning up the mess and now he’s happy. OK great Junior, now we can get rid of that remote. But Cody I don’t want to rid of the remote. There’s a fast-forward feature. I get fast forward do anything I don’t
want to sit through like uh-school. And uh- school. Ooh dude, what about school? Yeah school! I hate school! Me too! I actually kind of like school.
Because you’re a nerd Cody! A big nerd! Junior I don’t care what you want
to fast-forward through. We need to get rid of that remote! Well OK that’s Cody.We’ll make a deal if you can give me a give a long detailed scientific explanation of why I should get rid of that remote, then I’ll get rid of it. Uh really? Yep. I mean it’s gonna be really long and boring. Oh I want to hear it. OK well Junior I think you should get rid of this remote- *Fast Forward*(YAY!!) And that Junior is why you should not have that remote. Dude that was so cool! It was so cool! Really? You thought my explanation was cool? No it was cool because I fast-forward through your whole stupid explanation. Yeah. JUNIOR YOU DIDN’T HEAR ANYTHING I SAID?! THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE THAT REMOTE!!! Well Cody it was really long and boring I don’t want to hear it so I fast-forwarded through it. JUNIOR I TOLD YOU IT’S GONNA BE LONG AND BORING! Well Cody how about this? I’m sorry I did not mean to do that. It was just a joke. OK look the same deal if you give me that long explanation one more time I’ll get rid of it. No Junior you just get fast forward me! I swear I will not
fast-forward through it this time. I swear I will not. If I fast-forward
through it then you can punch me in the face and break this remote. Really? Yeah. You promise? Yeah. Wait he’s gonna break– Wait Joseph, hold on… So yeah give us the explanation, I promise. OK Junior I think you should get rid of that remote because your an- *Mute* (YAY!) Dude! I know you can’t hear him! What happened? I muted him! Yeah I put him on muted so now he doesn’t make any noise! Dude you did that a long time ago! I know it’s just a non-stop talking! Cody. Cody we can’t hear you.
It doesn’t matter what you say we can’t hear you Cody. You’re not making any noise! He’s so stupid. Yeah- Wha- unmute me Junior? No Cody. No Cod- I’m not- how about this Cody? If you’re a loser don’t say anything. – Hahahahaha
– He is a loser! what a loser! Junior this is exactly the kind of thing
that you shouldn’t be doing because you don’t need this from out okay okay look
look we have not used the rewind feature that’s the last feature I want to use
and I’ll get read the remote okay Junior what could you possibly need the rewind
feature for I know I know okay I know Hey Dad. What Junior? What do you want I’m trying to watch TV! Um I want to make a bet. Oh a bet? What kind of bet? WelI I want you to think of a number between 1 and 10 and if I guess right, then you’ll have to get me $100. But if I guess it wrong I have to give you $200. OK! We can do that! Looks like I’m about to make $200 easily! OK think of your number. Oh it’s kind of hard. Oh OK I got it! Oh OK is it one? Nope! Looks like you owe me $200! *Rewind* Oh OK I got it! Is it two? Nope! It looks like you owe me $200! *Rewind* Oh OK I got it! Is it three? Nope! It looks like you own me $200! *And it keeps going until we reach 8.* Is it eight? That’s right well I guess I’m
just a psychic dad pay up here’s your stupid hundred dollars
thanks dad Ripoff whenever I hear that I know something’s bad gosh
guess who just made $100 how did you make $100 with that remote well let me
think for a second ah let me just they go because I’m a genius
yeah dude if you got a hundred big ones out of it yeah a hundred big ones
smackeroonies hey great jr. you had your fun now we need to get rid of that
remote for real okay Cody how do you expect us just to get rid of this remote?
you thinks it’s gonna vanish? No, we couild, like, break it, or maybe there’s a
self-destruct button or a self-destruct button. No there’s a rewind or pod. Ooh, what about this Parent-Control Button? Cody: No, Junior, don’t- (And it got age-restricted. You shouldn’t trust Junior and friends.) Subtitles by WILSON PEREZRAMOS.
Significant changes by Natalie Chaet (AKA NDC) KimonoFlareonGX and Jack Gar Hansen.